Behind every woman’s exterior, there is a girl who dreams of more. Before you chastise me on that Oprah Winfrey statement, realize something. It is in our human nature to want more, to look at what we have and always say it isn’t enough. Some channel that into religion, and some greed. But in relationship we do this as well. I hope, when it comes time to have that special person in my life, I will not only take, but give. When I look on the other side of my comforter, I’ll look up to someone who needs me there just as much as I need him. Someone to love me just as passionately and irrevocably as I love him. When I come home from class, he will surprise me from behind, putting his arms around me making everything right in this world. By his embrace alone will I utterly melt into him. In the mean time, I’m comfortable waiting for such a relationship. I know one day, we will finally meet, and somehow he will make me believe in fairy tales. He will make me reconsider everything I have ever known. He and he alone will make believe in love at first sight. He will be everything and nothing I have ever dreamed of, my perfectly imperfect. To have this kind of love in possession is very dangerous and only put in the books. But somehow, someone saw fit to let me experience such tenderness, such fierceness, such emotion that not even the best writer or painter could ever recreate. Yes, I do yearn for more, just like every person who watched a Disney movie. But I believe I long differently. I don’t want a pretty boy who is perfect in every way. No, for I want a man who is so masculine, Hercules covet his skills. I want someone who occasionally swears when he hits his hand with a hammer, but its so gosh darn cute when he tries to hide his embarrassment. Someone who could possibly be the worst dancer in the world, but it wont matter because I will fit perfectly against him. When we dance, everything will be right in the world, because that’s where I belong, in his arms. Now, I have a feeling I am being prepared for this now. When the time is right, it will happen. By writing this, I have finally succumbed to my wants, but I believe they are more of needs. And I cannot wait for the day I will have that in my life, for I have a feeling it might be sooner than I think.
Friday, November 5, 2010
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Friday, August 20, 2010
1. COLLEGE! woot! yes i'm goin to byui but i will get my money back when i graduate with my MAIDEN name! haha! ok we'll see...i'm super stoked to move in on my own finally! ok with other girls still but no ADULTS! woot!
2.One of my best friends is coming home off of his mission! He's in argentina, and he'll be home on october 25! i'm ridiculously excited that he's coming home!
3. One of my good friends is getting married! Which scares me to death! Good luck shae! Well actually alot of my friends are married...i have a wall of shame ;D haha totally kidding..but i really have one...
4. NEW PEOPLE! i'm excited for a whole group of people to start evaluating me for the possibility for mariage or bridesmaid material...ha kidding
hecka yes! bring it on!!!
Sunday, July 4, 2010
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Monday, May 10, 2010
I would like to thank the people that have showed me kindness...by not even being kind to me directly. For they are our true leaders in this life. I hope god gives you everything and anything you deserve.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Monday, March 15, 2010
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Friday, January 8, 2010
Well this next week i start a new job, parttime but i'm still looking for a job, I think i want to try teaching some privates for other ballroom companies...sometimes i dont give myself credit for how good i have gotten, I was hestitent to try out for ballroom for college...maybe in a couple of years after college. I've officially become a hermit. I have lost all inhibition or pleasure in going out and hanging out with friends. I need to get out more, and actually..its not that i'm dissapointed with my friends, i love them all, but i wish i could find someone i could click with a little more. It seems like none of my friends have the COMPLETE package, one with morals and a personality...It seems like some of my friends are great in the personality department and suck with the church and they dont see all of my views, and dont get me wrong. I will always love them for who they are, but i wish i could find someone with everything. The only people i've met that are like that are all of missions! no bueno! I miss Pine Basin super bad! i think i will take a drive up there one day. Just to look at the stars.... GAH! Oh did i tell you i'm writing a book, just for fun..you should be proud...ah goodness i'm pathetic, just sitten here writing...haha oh i crack myself up!
Monday, January 4, 2010
This week i decided to mix things up and actually start to let people maybe take a look into...me
here are some things you probably didn't know about me
Sometimes, I like to meet new people, and i dont think there creepo's for actually taking the initative to start conversation...i actually quite enjoy it
My family happens to be my best friends... i swear my family is so histarical, and most of them are under the age of 13,
I happen to love frogs...ALOT. I loved the princess and the frog movie, i was going to see it a bunch o bunch of times but decided against it...i've kissed 98 frogs...yep real ones too
I enjoy NOT being the center of attention...dont get me wrong everyone is their leading actor in their movies of life, but sometimes...its nice just to be the best friend...makes life less dramaful
When i work, I WORK, i feel like i'm slackin if i am..and i hate that feeling...i'd like to think i have an over the top work ethic,
All my life, i've compaired myself to others..i've now learned to be the best me that i can be...
I have always thought I was going into culinary arts of somesort, but lately i want a job more meaningful... like a child psycologist...
I dont want to say i'm ready for a family, or that i want to settle down...but i do want to someday...when i'm around 21, i think thats a good time to start looking
I love singing and dancing, now i'm not the best at either..but i've come to decide i quite enjoy making choreography and i have gotten outstanding reviews from peers about it, which they wouldn't know anybetter but it doesn't hurt my confidence there
I've finally let myself forgive, even if others think i'm just too sweet to let it go..i'm ok with letting go. makes things alot easier.
I do want to go and see the world one day.. and i hate it when people say 'oh you need to do that before you get married' but in reality, i wouldn't want to do it alone, imagine being in a foreign place without anyone for support..and i know i could just take a friend, but when the time comes i'm ready to see the world, at whatever point in my life, if i'm married, i wouldn't be any happier to take a spouse
I have found great comfort in the scriptures, I know people are going to start seeing me as one of those 'goody two shoes' or whatever, and for a while i cared because i didn't want people to think of me that way. People tend to not trust when they here that. And i have always found that listening to peoples problems helps me for whatever reason, so i didn't want people to know that about me...But just because i love my religion, does not make me less understanding, and i hope you can trust me on that one
I learn by example, but somethings i just have to learn by myself...its kind of wierd i know.
I love watching movies...I love quoting them..makes me feel good inside haha
Alot of times i'll catch myself annoying myself, over stupid habits i've had all my life, time to grow up and get rid of those wierd laughs andstuff like that
Sometimes, its better to keep things inside, and oneday let it out, but i'd like to think the one thing that has influeced my life the most not a whole lot of people know, actually barely anyone knows, but i kind of like it that way
Well I've decided to let poeple know the real me, wow that was exilarating